The Master Teacher Blog

We may not think much about the attitude or demeanor we bring to the classroom and share with our students every day. We might assume that the instructional strategies we employ and the materials we use are what matter most. Or we may think that our students’ dispositions and their readiness to learn are what will determine whether the day will be successful. We might even assume that how challenging the lesson objective is will determine its outcome. 

It goes without saying that instructional strategies and support materials are important, that student readiness to learn matters, and that what students are learning can make a difference. However, these factors can be quickly and heavily eclipsed by the attitudes we ourselves present with and to our students every day. The unseen but pervasive atmosphere in our classroom on most days is formed by the mood and tone we project. For students who struggle, the influence of how we present how we feel about the day—and them—can have an outsized impact.  

When we are grumpy, students pull back and may even become grumpy, too, in response. When we are angry or depressed, students might search for the reason and/or keep their distance. When we do not feel good about what we are doing, students pick up on it and may worry that it is in some way connected to them. 

On the other hand, when our attitude projects caring, support, confidence, and persistence, all the other factors that can impact success become contributing rather than determinative. Let’s examine six key attitudes that can have an outsized influence on the success of our students—and by extension, us.  

Patience supported by belief in potential. High expectations rest on an understanding that our students have the potential to improve, perform, and succeed. We may need to adjust the pace or moderate our approach, but when students feel that we believe in them and their ability to succeed, they are more likely to take learning risks and persist until they are successful.  

Readiness to adapt and be flexible. We cannot accurately predict what the day will bring. We may plan meticulously only to face an unexpected interruption, encounter an unanticipated barrier, or experience the malfunction of a key tool or piece of equipment. Our willingness to shift, modify, or even abandon what we planned without undue complaint can reassure students that we know what we are doing and will not be deterred in our commitment to support their learning.  

Empathy and emotional support. Students want to know that we care about them and value what matters to them. An attitude of listening and caring can have a lifelong impact for a student who is struggling or may be facing a significant life challenge. Taking the stance that our students are people first can make a big difference.   

Valuing effort and progress. Not every student will immediately grasp a new concept or quickly master a new skill. Learning can take many paths, and students often begin their learning journeys in different places. Of course, we need to be concerned about outcomes, but the greatest value in the learning we foster is found in teaching our students how to learn. Helping students to find the best strategies, coaching the best type of effort to give, and supporting the progress they are making can have a much greater impact than a pat on the back for earning a good grade.  

Passion for teaching and learning. Our students are perceptive, and they can feel when we want them to be inspired by what they are learning and curious about what more they might learn. Our excitement when they overcome a challenge or achieve a learning victory can send a powerful message about why we choose to teach and how we feel about them and their learning.  

Consistency and fairness. Students want to know that we will treat them and their classmates equitably regardless of who they are or what their learning history is. Being consistent when enforcing rules and fair when students misstep can build trust and create a sense of security. When students know what we expect and trust that they will be treated fairly, they are more likely to engage in challenging work and listen to our guidance and advice. 

When students feel a sense of optimism, patience, possibility, and empathy from us, we set the stage for success. We may make a mistake, students may struggle, and many things might go wrong, yet learning will still grow, students will still feel connected and cared for, and we can still have a successful day. 

As we begin the second half of the school year, we can all use some renewed energy and attitude refreshment. We might want to leave behind some of what happened in the first several months of the year, and a shift in routine and some new perspectives can lift our spirits. While we may not be able to fully restart, there are steps we can take to reset our attitude, change up our routines, adopt new approaches, and discover useful tools.

Of course, there remains much from the first semester that we nurtured and coached with students that we want to maintain. However, students, too, will want to have new experiences and try fresh approaches to what lies ahead. Consider these six reset-and-refresh ideas to help your students—and you—get off to an energized start for the second half of the year.

Reorganize and refresh the classroom. Physically reorient the classroom. Maybe the “front” of the room can face a new direction. You might reconfigure student seating to support more collaboration or reduce distractions. New posters, quotes, and displays of student work are options, too (but be careful not to over-decorate). Studies have shown that changing the space where we work, learn, and live can reset our thinking patterns and shift our work habits. Not unlike occupying a new space, making changes in the space where we spend our days can be refreshing.

Get reacquainted with students. Rather than just welcoming students back with all the experiences and judgments accumulated during the first half of the year, commit to taking a fresh look. Be intentional about finding something new and interesting about each student. Let go of anything that might hold back or impede your relationship with them. You might go as far as reintroducing yourself and having students do the same. Letting go of history and connecting with students where they are now can open productive doors to learning and growth for us and them.

Revisit classroom rules and routines. Shifting routines can add novelty and variety as students return. Consider revisiting existing rules with students, reminding students why rules are important, and exploring with students any changes they think might be useful and warranted. Your flexibility and understanding can be a good opening message as students return. As an added challenge, see if you and your students can state all rules in language that explains what students can and should do rather than what they cannot do. For example, rather than having a rule that says, “Don’t run in the halls,” the rule might be stated as “Walk when traveling in the hallway.”

Set classroom goals. Consider teaching and coaching students to set goals. If goal setting was not part of students’ experience during the first portion of the year, setting some now can be an energizing and focus-building activity. The goals might be shared by the entire class or set individually. If the goals are group-based, it is usually best to focus the goals on behavior, relationships, or other non-academic elements to avoid placing undue stress and pressure on students who face learning challenges. Individually set goals might address these same elements and include academics, but having students focus on improvement rather than performance gives every student something for which they can strive.

Adopt a new artificial intelligence (AI) tool that can save you time and make your life easier. One of the promises of newly developed AI tools is that they can perform routine tasks that teachers previously had to do themselves. As examples, AI tools can draft correspondence, assist with lesson planning, and suggest real-life applications for what we are teaching. Take some time to explore, then decide what tool (or tools) might be most helpful and try them out.

Try a new instructional strategy. Start by reflecting on the types of concepts, categories of skills, or areas of content where students typically struggle. Talk with colleagues, check with professional development staff, consult instructional coaches, do an internet search, or tap other resources to see what might work for you. You might identify several options and possibilities. However, start by trying just one that seems to be the best match with your need. If that approach doesn’t accomplish what you want, having other options positions you to keep trying until you find what works for you. The key is to choose something that meets a need and will help you to be more successful.

Treating the return to school as simply resuming the work begun in the first part of the year may be the easiest option, but injecting some novelty and creating some variety can give us and our students a welcome lift. Also, treating this time as an opportunity for a new start can give everyone permission and encouragement to let go of what is not helpful and adopt what may hold more potential.

In many cultures, this is a time of the year when gifts are given to family, friends, colleagues, and others. The gift-giving tradition generates feelings of generosity and gratitude, but it can also feel like a burden and an obligation. During an already busy and pressure-filled time, we find ourselves stretching budgets, pressing for time, and searching our brains for gift ideas.

Unfortunately, gift giving under these conditions can risk us missing the value of gifts given freely and thoughtfully with the recipient in mind. Gift giving should not feel like an obligation. The gifts that matter the most, regardless of the time of year or tradition behind them, come from our hearts filled with the joy and happiness of the receiver in mind.

In fact, some of the most precious gifts we can give aren’t tangible objects or expensive selections. Instead, the gifts that matter most tend to cost the least and are given without expectation or obligation. Here are six gifts we can offer now or at any time of the year that communicate our caring, demonstrate our generosity, and cost us nothing. Most important, they can be priceless to those who receive them.

The first gift is our simple, attentive listening. Listening communicates respect and value. Our willingness to be still and really listen to others offers a precious gift to those who need to be heard and want to be understood. We don’t have to have all the answers. We may have no solutions to offer, but our willingness to give our time, dedicate our attention, and actively care matters more than we know.

A second gift is our willingness to accept others without conditions and expectations. Our society, our communities, our schools, and even our families are becoming more diverse. People who see life differently from us, whose lifestyles may be different from ours, and whose goals are not goals we would choose to pursue still deserve to be accepted for who they are. Still, the sad reality is that people often face barriers, discrimination, and pressures to conform that are debilitating. Our willingness to accept and value those who may not be exactly like us is a welcome gift and gives reassurance of their inherent value as a person.

The third gift is our willingness to offer encouragement and give support to those who may be struggling and need someone who believes in them and wants them to succeed. However, our encouragement needs to be authentically offered and our support genuinely extended. Often just knowing that we’re confident in them and their potential to succeed is enough to encourage them through their struggle and get them to move forward.

A fourth gift is to reach out and lend a hand without expectations or obligations. Our willingness to give our energy, insight, skills, and time can be a relief-giving gift when someone feels overwhelmed, inadequate, and alone. We may not see our assistance as special or unusual, but when offered at just the right time, freely given, and obligation-free, our offer of assistance can be a burden-lifting and much appreciated gift.

The fifth gift is our willingness to forgive, let go of past grievances, and restore relationships. Disappointment, resentment, and separation result in heavy burdens both for those who harbor these feelings and for those who are the object of them. The feelings may have roots in legitimate grievances. Past words or actions may have caused hurt. However, hurt feelings and grievances rarely maintain any value over time. Deciding to forgive, let go, and restore relationships that matter to us create valuable, life-lifting gifts.

The sixth gift may be simplest, yet it can make an outsized difference. That gift is a smile. A genuine smile assures others we see and notice them. A smile offers hope and communicates caring. It’s difficult to ignore a bright and friendly smile. A smile brightens a day and offers hope. It‘s been said that “If we meet someone too worried or distressed to give us a smile, we should leave one of ours. For no one needs a smile quite as much as someone who has none to give.”

In this season of giving and of gratitude, these gifts can have astounding positive effects on those around us. Additionally, these gifts also offer special value to us as their givers. Each of these gifts enrich our lives, make us more optimistic, and leave us feeling happier. It’s a no-brainer that these dual benefits make these gifts worth giving!

This time of year is emotionally challenging for many students. The holidays can be a time of uncertainty and stress. Relationships formed earlier in the year may not be going well or may have disintegrated. The end of the calendar year may include challenges and deadlines that are disruptive to families. Meanwhile, colder weather and fewer hours of sunlight can lead to emotional stress and dips in mental health. The list could go on.

Of course, we, too, might be experiencing stress, pressure, disappointment, and uncertainty that make it challenging to sense our students’ struggles and respond in helpful and supportive ways. As a result, we can misstep, overstep, or under-respond to students who need our attention and support.

Admittedly, these may not be easy or comfortable situations. However, with a few reminders, we can avoid some of the most common mistakes and missteps in response to student emotional challenges. Here are six “potholes” worthy of our reflection and avoidance as we enter the holiday season.

Assuming—We might think that we know or can predict why a student is upset. Yet, what is causing the student’s emotions may actually have nothing at all to do with what we assume. Our jumping to conclusions can leave the student feeling unheard, misunderstood, and discounted.

Instead: We can put aside our preconceived notions and ask open-ended questions that invite the student to share what they are feeling and why. Our interest can lead to understanding, and our concern will be reassuring. Meanwhile, we will not have to backtrack and apologize for assuming that we knew what we did not.

Shaming—We can be tempted to tell a student variations of “get over it,” “toughen up,” or “just ignore it.” However, even when we softly convey those sentiments, we discount the student’s concern and risk sending the message that what they are feeling is not worthy, that expressing emotion is not acceptable, or that they should be ashamed.

Instead: We need to reassure students that it is natural to experience strong emotions, even when they are negative. Everyone goes through times when they face difficult circumstances and struggle. We can normalize the expression of emotion as a sign of strength, not weakness.

Overlooking—We might be busy or distracted, only to discover that we missed or misinterpreted multiple clues that a student needed our attention and support. Students do not always verbally or directly tell us when they are struggling. They do not always reach out and request our help. Yet, they may be sending multiple messages via shifts in their behavior and body language or through other nonverbal cues.

Instead: We can be mindful and observant of our students’ behavior. When a talkative student suddenly goes silent, a usually even-tempered student immediately becomes agitated, or a demonstrative student withdraws, we need to check in with them in an inquiring, non-judgmental manner.

Abandoning—We might have an initial conversation with a student that seems to help and then we move on to other things. Yet, the student may still be struggling and may need more support. Or we may promise to do or provide something but neglect to follow up or follow through.

Instead: Make it a point to check back with distraught students to see how they are doing and if they need anything. Following up and following through builds trust and communicates that we value our students and their well-being.

Pressing—We might think that we can convince upset students to let go and move forward quickly or that we have given them a solution to their situation that they should accept and implement immediately. We might feel the urgency of students getting back to work, but we need to remember that moving beyond intense emotions such as anxiety, worry, and grief takes time. Pressing during these times can leave students feeling unheard or misunderstood. As a result, their feelings may intensify.

Instead: We can step back and give students time to process their feelings and regain composure. We might suggest a break, moving to a private space, or even a few minutes to calm themselves. Of course, we need to reassure the student that we are available if they need to talk more.

Overreacting—Sometimes the emotions students are feeling touch a pain point in our emotions or stimulates a strong reaction in us. We might react harshly or become emotional ourselves. In either case, we risk escalating the student’s emotional state, setting off a power struggle, or struggling to deal with our own emotions.

Instead: We can focus on remaining calm and in control. Rather than reacting, we might respond by recognizing that the student is upset and inquire about what is causing it. Also, giving the situation some time by pausing, taking a deep breath, or physically stepping back can create space for us to gain control and avoid making the situation worse. Later, we can reflect on why we reacted so strongly and what we may need to do to feel better.

Dealing with emotions is hard. The challenge is even greater for young people as they navigate relationships, mature, and encounter many of life’s experiences for the first time. Obviously, we cannot always prevent or change their feelings, nor can we solve all their emotional difficulties. However, we can be ready with our attention, support, encouragement, and patience. Very often, that is enough.

What we intend with our words and actions may be laudable and admirable, but what students and others experience does not always align with what we mean and expect. When there is a disconnect, we can feel surprised, disappointed, and frustrated in response. However, as tempting as it might be, we cannot simply blame students or others for not interpreting what we say and do in a manner consistent with our intentions.

Even though our intentions might be pure, when the impact elicits a negative response or is misinterpreted, we must first examine our role in the situation. The only actions we control are our own. Understanding where and how a disconnect occurred starts by accepting responsibility, working to rectify the current situation, and understanding how to prevent its reoccurrence in the future.

How does intention become disconnected from impact? The culprit might be any of several factors. Here are four common causes:

• Our communication style or strategy. Our message may not have actually been clear to its recipient. Our tone may have been harsher or more critical than we intended. It might even be that what we said and how we said it was fine, but our body language betrayed us or communicated something else unintentionally.
• Assumptions we made about readiness to hear and learn. Students may not have fully mastered the skills on which new content and actions depend. They may have learned—but since forgotten—crucial information and processes necessary for success in the planned activity. Others may have been distracted or not had the background understanding we assumed.
• The strategy we chose to motivate. A setup that previously was motivating may no longer hold the same meaning and pull. Our word choice may have undermined the motivational message we intended. Or our timing might have been off and, as such, people may have misread what we were attempting to accomplish.
• Our intent and the context may not have been a match. What happened the day prior, or even earlier in the day, might have poisoned the context. Consequently, despite our intent, students or others were unable to separate their emotions and let go of their negative perceptions of us and the situation.

The obvious questions are, how we can reduce the potential for a disconnect to occur between our intentions and the impact of our actions, and what can we learn when disconnects do occur? Here are five strategies worth considering:

• Assume positive intentions. Assuming positive intentions reduces the temptation to blame others for the impact. Once we decide to blame others, we risk not fully understanding what happened, how we might fix the disconnect, and what we might learn to avoid repetition in the future.
• Reflect. The precipitating action was ours, in one way or another, so reflecting is a good place to start. When we understand what we missed, misinterpreted, or assumed incorrectly, we can begin to uncover where and how the disconnect occurred.
• Ask for feedback. In real time, checking for understanding and soliciting feedback can help us to avoid plunging ahead when others are not with us. In retrospect, feedback can offer hints and insights about how our words or actions had an impact, and we can begin to close the information loop.
• Look for communication gaps and gaffs. What we said and how we said it—and what we did and how we did it—matters. As much as we may think that we were clear, the proof is in the reception of information, not in the sending of it.
• Be aware of nonverbal clues and cues. Confused looks, frowns, furrowed brows, crossed arms, physically turning away, and whispered comments are just a few of the clues we might observe when our intent is not having the impact we expect. These behaviors are cues that it is time for us to stop and sort what is happening before any additional confusion, consternation, or disconnection occurs.
• Take responsibility and be accountable. When our first step in repairing a disconnect is taking responsibility, we open communication and reduce the need for others to explain, defend, or blame. We may need to explain and clarify our intentions, but we also need to be ready to apologize if we could or should have seen the disconnect coming.

Every day, we strive to lift our students, nurture in them a love for learning, and lead them to see a future filled with possibility. Sometimes we get it right and we see an amazing impact. At other times, we may need to stop, step back, and set a new course. These are times for reflection, learning, and recommitment, not occasions for regret or retreat. Every day, we have a new opportunity to turn positive intentions into amazing impacts.

We have all had the experience of having our proverbial buttons pushed. For some of us, it happens more often than for others. The trigger can be something someone says or does, a situation or problem we face, or even a painful or embarrassing memory that suddenly pops into our consciousness. What we experience may be the result of something unintentional or happenstance, or it may be purposeful action of someone to distract us or create a reaction.  

Occasionally, something completely new and unexpected is the culprit that pushes our reactive “button,” but more often, what we experience is part of a pattern or relates to a topic or situation that has bedeviled or greatly bothered us before. Of course, there are many stimuli that hold the potential to generate a negative or unsettling reaction. What is more important is that we understand and have strategies for managing situations in which we find ourselves becoming uncomfortable, angry, or otherwise off balance in response to what we hear or experience.  

The next time you feel your buttons being pushed, consider these strategies in response:  

• Take a breath. Give yourself a few seconds to gain control of your emotions. Creating space between what is happening and your response can provide an opportunity to decide your best action, rather than “taking the bait.” 

• Stay calm. Immediately pushing back or responding in kind can needlessly escalate the situation. Your composure positions you to choose what to do next rather than concede control to the other person or circumstance.  

• Ask a question. A question can help to clarify the statement, question, or situation. Often what we initially interpret as negative, accusatory, or demeaning may not be what we assume. A clarifying question can also help us to reflect on a situation or offer the other person an opportunity to backtrack or clarify their intent. 

• Acknowledge your feelings. Anger, confusion, or other reactive feelings are natural responses. However, being aware of how you are feeling, without judging, can help to frame a more measured and thoughtful response.  

• Own your feelings. Use “I” statements to express how the statement or situation is affecting you. This way, you can resist placing blame or making accusations. Explaining and owning how you feel is an honest response and creates an opportunity to clarify intentions or revise a message. 

• Reframe the situation. Rather than going with your initial interpretation, be curious about what was said or how the situation appears. Look for an opportunity to see the situation differently and create a more confident and comfortable path forward. What was intended is less important than the meaning you assign to what happened or was said. 

• Look for solutions. If what stimulated your reaction was a memory or situation, consider how you might reduce its power and avoid reacting emotionally. These situations have meaning, and understanding their power can provide hints for managing the impact. If the stimulus is the words or actions of others, explore whether you can reach an agreement or understanding to avoid repetition, or at least establish boundaries regarding behavior that you find unacceptable.  

• Consider whether to walk away. If the conversation becomes too heated or is becoming unproductive, the best strategy may be to create some distance, either by agreeing to drop the subject for now, or physically walking away for the moment and revisiting the conversation later.  

• Decide what can be learned. Once the situation has passed and you can think calmly, reflect on what happened, why it mattered to you, and how you might engage differently in the future. Almost certainly, you will face similar challenges in the future. Learning what you can and planning how best to respond can be well-spent time.  

Having our buttons pushed is not typically a comfortable sensation. What someone says or does can lead us to feel disrespected or manipulated. When what grabs our attention is a situation or memory, we can feel caught and bewildered. Yet, all these situations carry messages for us to heed, learn from, and plan to manage in the future.  

Somedays, when that last dismissal bell rings, we might struggle to determine if that day was a successful one. It may have been filled with interruptions, disruptions, and distractions. We may have struggled with a lesson plan that did not go as envisioned. Technology might have injected itself in unwelcome ways as students engaged in learning tasks. Some students may have been unprepared, while others had difficulty engaging in planned activities. Of course, the list could go on.  

However, having a day unfold exactly as planned does not necessarily mean that it was a success, either. “Winning” the day has more to do with the experiences, connections, and insights students gained than how smoothly it went. We can become distracted with order and predictability and miss the crucial elements that help students to become better learners and people—and the role we play in making this magic happen.  

A great way to measure the success of any day is to reflect on the elements that really matter. Despite all that may not have gone as planned, we may have made a crucial difference and moved learning and our relationship with students forward in important ways. The next time you are uncertain about whether the day mattered, ask yourself these five questions. 

Today, did I reinforce my confidence in the inevitability of my students’ success? Our confidence sends a strong message to students, especially for students who may be struggling or lack confidence in themselves. Our belief in the potential of our students gives us permission to hold high expectations and nudge students to do their best work. Our expectations can grow the confidence students feel, build their willingness to try, and help them to persist when they are challenged. Students want to hear, “You can do it, and I am here to help.”  

Today, did I listen deeply to a student? Listening can be a very empowering action. Our attention matters. Students want to know that we notice them and care about what they have to say. Deep listening also can reveal important information and insights about our students. The time we spend focusing, gaining an understanding, and responding can be among the most impactful minutes of our day. Interestingly, as few as 20-30 seconds can be enough to have an impact.   

Today, did I ensure that a student felt they were supported and belonged? Maybe I used a student’s name in a positive example. I may have shared an insightful observation from a student who does not receive much attention. I may have made time for students to share something about themselves and noted how important it is to know and support each other. Feeling connected, respected, valued, and belonging are among the most powerful conditions to support learners and learning. 

Today, did I reinforce the purpose and usefulness of what my students are learning? We understand the value of the information we are sharing with our students and the skills we are teaching them, but the connection may not be present for or clear to them. Students do better when they see the utility of what they are asked to learn. On that note, learning must have benefits beyond doing well on a test or receiving a good grade. Consistently making this connection for students can build learning momentum and keep students engaged when the work is challenging and learning does not come easily.  

Today, did the lesson I designed include a discovery? Maybe we revealed a new insight, created an “a-ha” moment, or built in an interesting question that uncovered new understanding. The moment may have featured a connection between new learning and something students already knew, helped them to grasp the purpose of a process, or provided proof that helped students to see their progress. 

Committing to focus on what matters most can help us to build momentum in learning and our relationships with students despite distractions and disruptions. Obviously, this list is not exhaustive. Other behaviors and connections matter, too. What would you add to the list and why?  

Historically, education has been one of the last places where partisan politics and conflicts were likely to play out. School-board elections were relatively quiet affairs in which community-minded people stepped forward to lend their time to guide and support their local schools. School curriculum was rarely a flash point for conflict and debate. Schools were places where consistency and support were largely assumed.

However, in the aftermath of the pandemic, schools and the world of education itself have become fertile ground for debate, conflict, and conspiracy. Issues that used to be taken for granted are spotlighted for attack. Partisan politics have become commonplace in school-board races, policy debates, and instructional practices.

Amid such conflict and confusion, we can become distracted from the fundamental responsibilities schools exist to fulfill. So many of the debates are around side issues and distractions that we can lose focus on what is most important. Yet, our voices and our advocacy remain important and need to play a role in the debate over what schools should be and need to do. More than ever, we need to focus on what is most important and what our students need us to do on their behalf. Putting aside the distractions and manufactured issues, here are ten things worth our fighting for:

A safe and supportive environment: Physical, emotional, and psychological safety must be priorities. Students deserve learning environments that are free from bullying, bias, and intimidation. They need to know that there are adults around them who know and are ready to advocate for them.

A future filled with opportunities: Students deserve to experience an education that prepares them for the future they choose. They deserve ample opportunities to develop skills, be exposed to multiple career and life options, and build social currency in the community and beyond. A student’s family or history should not be predictive of their future.

Opportunities to speak and be heard: Students’ perspectives and input should be valued in decisions regarding their school experience. A student’s academic record, family, or social standing should not determine whether their voice is heard and heeded. Respect must be assured regardless of who chooses to speak.

Fair and equitable discipline: A student’s race, socioeconomic status, behavior history, or other demographic factors must not drive discipline decisions. Discipline needs to be seen as an equitable opportunity for teaching and learning rather than as an occasion for punishment. When consequences are called for, they should be in response to the specific behavior, not the personality or identity of the student.

Respect for culture, history, and life experiences: The curriculum needs to reflect the makeup of the student population and offer exposure to a wide variety of perspectives, traditions, and experiences. Students need to see relevance in their learning experiences, and the curriculum should foster a sense of identity and belonging in addition to academic content.

Instruction that is responsive to what students are ready to learn: Instruction should be designed with students in mind. Their learning needs, readiness, and uniqueness must be key considerations in how instruction is presented, support is offered, and progress is assessed. Students, regardless of special needs and gifts, deserve to be supported in a manner that fosters success for them.

Exposure to diverse perspectives: Students should be exposed to and have opportunities to engage with others who think differently, have different life experiences, and approach life in unique ways. Learning needs to be embedded in context and be rich with opportunities to explore and develop unique ideas and perspectives. Students should be encouraged to appreciate other ways of thinking and varied viewpoints.

Access to arts, sports, clubs, and other extracurricular activities: Students need multiple places to belong and varied opportunities to develop skills beyond academics. They deserve access to informal opportunities to make friends and learn to work and play productively with others. Students should have places beyond the classroom where they feel connected and belong.

Well-prepared and supported staff: Teachers and other staff need access to rich resources and learning opportunities to develop the skills necessary to prepare today’s students for a world of rapid change, unpredictability, and constant innovation. Compensation, working conditions, and expectations must support educators at a level that is adequate and sustainable. Much of what is worth fighting for will become empty promises if school staff members lack the resources and support to be able to deliver.

Equitable access to resources and support: Adequate funding and facilities are fundamental to supporting opportunities and options for students to succeed. Curricular opportunities need to be rich and not restricted to certain groups of students. Mental and physical health services must be available and aligned with the needs of students. Allocation of resources should be based on needs and the creation of opportunities for success.

Fighting for what is important takes courage. The future of our students and our society depends on sustained advocacy for what matters and what will make our shared future better. We may be tempted to remain quiet and hope that the situation will improve. However, our students have too much to lose to justify our silence. As the saying goes: If not us, who? If not now, when?

Despite how positive and optimistic we seek to be, we can find ourselves pulled down by having to listen to what feel like chronic complainers. Regardless of the situation, some people always seem to find something to complain about. They may even appear to be addicted to complaining. Sound familiar? For these people, nothing ever seems good enough, they are quick to find problems, and they often ignore what seem like obvious solutions.

Of course, some complaints are legitimate and deserve consideration and action. We need to be careful to avoid assuming that a complaint coming from a frequent complainer is not worthy and deserving of attention. In these cases, we need to be ready to listen and consider their complaint with an open mind and give it legitimate attention.

However, responding effectively and productively to chronic complainers is not always simple. We hear lots of advice, but it is often contradictory. Some people advise using humor, while others counsel to avoid making light of or discounting concerns. Some suggest pointing out the good things in the complainer’s life or situation, but others counter that with caution to avoid appearing to minimize the significance of the concern. Still others suggest drawing attention to the frequency with which the person complains, but others offer the counter-advice of recognizing that the current complaint may be legitimate.

The best approach, of course, is to consider the complainer and complaints within context. Choosing how to respond depends on what we know about the complainer and complaint, our relationship to the complainer, and the power we may have to do something about the situation. Each of these factors can play a role in the strategy we choose for responding and the results we hope to achieve.

Fortunately, there is a five-step approach to engaging with chronic complainers around which there is broad agreement:

1. We can listen for the need. Complaints can be intended to meet a variety of needs. As we listen, we might ask ourselves: What is driving this complaint? Is the complainer seeking attention? Does the complainer want recognition or to be taken seriously? Or is the complainer looking for a solution and the support to implement it? Understanding what is driving a complaint can provide the insight we need to respond effectively.
2. We need to empathize and acknowledge the concern. We may not agree with the substance of the complaint, but we can recognize how the complainer sees the situation and empathize with how they might feel as a result. Arguing rarely moves the conversation forward or leads to resolution.
3. We can ask what they see as a good solution. We may find that the complainer offers a useful answer to move the situation forward. If we assume that what we are about to hear is just another complaint, we risk missing what could be an important issue to be resolved. If we hear a promising solution, we might ask what the complainer sees as some initial steps toward resolution.
4. If the complainer seems stuck on the complaint, we might nudge the conversation toward solutions and shifting their perspective. We might ask if there is another way to look at the situation. Or we might inquire about what they have tried and what else they have considered.
5. If the conversation seems not to be moving forward, we might ask, “Do you want my advice?” If the complainer is genuinely stuck, they are likely to be open to hear what we might offer. We might suggest some initial steps, share some ideas about who would be able to do something about their complaint, or we might suggest some additional options for them to consider.

The complainer may choose to do nothing to resolve their complaint, but they will have been assured that their concern was heard and taken seriously. Meanwhile, we will have modeled a process that positions the complainer to take responsibility for finding a solution, not just identifying and voicing a complaint.